According to the psychiatric Kubler-Ross model of grief, the first stage is denial…pretty apt model if you ask me. I think that is pretty close to the emotion I’ve been feeling since last night when I got off the phone with the Dean of the medic program I’ve been competing to get into. “…you’re the last one I needed to get in touch with, and if you’re still interested, I’d like to offer you a seat in the class.” Interested? Hell yeah, I’m interested! Every page read, every note card made, every class taken, every job worked at for the last two and a half years…building to this moment. Interested is an understatement. “Absolutely sir! Thank you so much for the offer.” “Well congratulations again, Merry Christmas, and we are looking forward to seeing you on the first day of class!” First came the celebration of course; calls made to every loved one and close friend who I keep in touch with frequently. Second came the social media announcement, because I couldn’t call myself a millennial without taking to Facebook to post about my accomplishment. Finally, I sat down to digest the news and pour myself a celebratory drink before dreaming happy dreams of finally working up to a major block in my career advancement ladder. Sweet, sweet dreams…

It wasn’t until this morning that realization hit me. The thought occurred to me that I need to start my studies now to begin to get prepared to dive into this thing head first. Now I’m not naive about the rigors of medic school; I’ve read too many books and chatted with too many current medics to believe things are going to be all rainbows and puppy farts. In fact, my military training has taught me to always assume every school/training course is going to be a real shit sandwich that I’m gonna have to choke down and anything better is a gift from Jesus or Buddha or Tom Cruise or whomever is driving this runaway bus. Plus, Paramedic Prep gave me a bit of an insight into the academic hell i’m walking into. However, as I crack open my SD County Protocol book, I began to realize the sheer insane amount of knowledge i’m going to have to absorb in a relatively short amount of time. I think it was the drug chart that really brought this home. Acetaminophen, Albuterol, Amiodrone, Atropine…how many drugs can you start with the letter A??? IO access, IV access, Magill foreceps…man there is going to be a crazy amount of info to learn. Plus all the anatomy and physiology to keep reviewing…great. This is what you’ve always wanted right Panda? You’re damn right it is. Maybe I’m courageous? I have a sinking suspicion that I’m either crazy or masochistic. Either way, it’s time to bite the bullet and get this thing going. Tomorrow is another day and I’ve got about 37 days to be as well studied as I can be walking in.

Though…it is never too late to go back to school to be a history major or something like that…

I know, I know, I know…I’m probably the 346,253rd person to write a blog about being a student in paramedic school or some other medical schooling. And I’m here to tell you…I don’t care (insert sarcastic laughter here). 

No, I’m not that mean or cynical. Or am I?…

Anyways, welcome to my blog! This is going to be a semi-daily blog about my journey into, through, and out of paramedic school here in sunny San Diego County. I will be writing down my thoughts, experiences, lessons learned, and, for anyone that actually wants to glean some information from my journey, some tips for others looking to begin this crazy circus called medic school. We will laugh together (hopefully), cry together (probably), rage together (definitely), and with any luck, come out the other side of this traumatic experience together a little smarter, a lot more liable, and somewhat more useful. For those of you that decide to stick with me, feel free to leave comments with your own experiences and stories. Also, feel free to ask questions and I’ll try to answer them to the best of my questionable abilities. As you come along with me, you’ll find out bits and pieces of my background along the way. Now you can say what you want, but in order to be as free in expressing my thoughts as possible (as ironic as this will sound), I will be keeping school, agency, instructor, and classmate names either anonymous or as general as possible to keep them from being identified. Additionally, I will be using the pseudonym “Panda” to refer to myself. This will allow me to be as open, honest, and raw with you as possible.

 Now with all the introductory mumbo-jumbo out of the way…sit back, relax, and hold on for dear life. Medic school here we come!